You want ME to do WHAT for a driving license??

I have to say this before you get too deep into this very disturbing blog... this experience has been a massive blow to my ego.. a huge injustice.. unbelievably unbelievable.. a gross failure of the system... ok ok. you get the point.

The need: A local UAE drivers license
Problem: Should not be any problems at all... after all we are talking about ME getting a license
At Fault: The damn system!

Alright, so the ordeal started when I first got to the UAE in October, 2007. I went to get myself a drivers license so that I could get a long term car to be more mobile around here. I was told that because I am an Indian citizen, I have to get a residence visa before I can get a license. Ok, a little weird, but fine.. so the process to get a residence visa started and after 2 months.. I finally got one at the beginning of February.

Alright, try number 2, now armed with a residence visa and a U.S. drivers license.
Me: Sir, I have a residence visa and a U.S. Drivers license, can I get a local license please?
Man behind the counter (MBC): Can I see your passport
Me: Sure, here it is.
MBC: Oh, you are an Indian citizen?
Me: Yes
MBC: You can't get a license without taking driving classes
Me: What??? Driving lessons??? But I already have a drivers license from two countries! I've had a U.S. license for 5 years and have driven on the right hand side of the road for that long!
MBC: You have to be a U.S. citizen to be able to use the U.S. license and get a UAE license right away. If you are an Indian citizen, you have to go and take driving classes.. Thank You.

What the crap!?!?! ME?? Take driving lessons?? (still hasn't sunk in). I mean, I have never taken driving lessons, if there is one thing I take pride in, its my driving. I've been driving since I was 10!! .. after a while I think to myself - let me at least go and see what these driving lessons entail...

Now I think to myself... F&@# it, I'm just going to have to take taxi's everywhere. Why? What I found out about the driving lessons absolutely destroyed what was left of my ego.

20 classes, 1/2 hour each, max two per day.. so that itself will take me 2 weeks at the minimum. During that, a Preliminary lecture, a signal lecture, a final lecture and a safety protection training course! What on earth?? Oh, and if the lecturer woke up on the wrong side of his damn bed, or is having a crap day and decides to fail ME(!) on a lesson, I have to start all over again!

The best is yet to come, first problem, I will have to wait a minimum of 3 months to get on the list to be able to get into a class. 3 months??? And then take driving LESSONS??! Then, after all this, I find out how much it will cost... AED 2,000!! That is $544.95!! For a drivers license??? Are you freaking kidding me? I am NOT paying that much and going through all that to drive here! I'm going to take taxi's everywhere. I can't believe I just said that. Damn it all!